Oh my, where have you been, my dear dear blog I am so sorry. The chaos of my life has engulfed me and there are no words to apologize, I am sorry for the neglect, I wish I could toss my hair, bat my eyelashes and bring you to to Dan Tana's. Maybe I'll do that, me and my computer and a plate of spaghetti and meatballs, sounds like an ideal date. Part of my chaos was good, it involved a Saturday off, go figure, I had an anxiety attack at the thought of it. What to do, what to do? I could not contain my excitement. The last time I really got excited about a Saturday night off was when I had my very first boyfriend. He would take me out for pizza and the movies and we would make out for hours in the playground. Saturday was our day. As I grew up and encountered the pangs of love, Saturday's became a work day. I think I'm gonna change that up, times are a changin.
Last night, I went to a fabulous art opening in Echo Park. It's closest thing I can get to NYC in terms of moxie. The cool peeps were out in full force and I practiced the art of conversation. The couple of guys that approached me sounded like they taught diction and I just cracked jokes with my nasally Massachusetts a's. It was a beautiful night, the weather was like summer, we drank wine and ate cheese from a platter. I felt alive and home and realized I need to slap on some red lipstick and venture out more. I was told I was charming and pretty and a perfect stranger walked up to me and called me an "earth goddess". Usually I feel like the farthest from pretty let alone a character from Greek mythology. It changed up my game.
I was surrounded by art and people that make a difference. Kind souls. People I could learn from. I felt inspired and hope started to flicker once again. Dare I say, I couldn't wipe the big fat smile off of my face. I'm glad I went out to play, it's fabulous, I wonder where I forgot about it along the way.
Today I painted a mask. It represented the mask I wear in my everyday life. I'm always happy, nothing bothers me, I help others, I'm independent, I can do it all on my own. Well I'm not always happy, I get sad from time to time and things do bother me. Big puffed up inflated egos get on my damn nerves and a sense of entitlement makes me want to barf daintily. I am independent but a nice cute guy to shower with kisses makes the day brighter and I can do it all on my own but it wouldn't be that much fun.
Next week I have Friday off, (another weekend day, I am beside myself) I wonder which sandbox I'll play in then.
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