The Remnants...

I lived right around the block from Madonna, threw fabulous parties, died my hair platinum blonde, hung out with Robert Frost's niece, she was a smartie pants and a big model, I learned so much from her. When I hit my 30's, I tried, to do the husband thing but I picked the wrong guy.  Somehow, this "anything's possible theory" had holes in it.....

My blog site freaked out and was down for two days.  The above paragraph was all I could salvage from my last entry.  Sounds like I was on to something juicy.  If I wrack my brain, I'm sure I could remember it.  Not now though, I'm on the verge of short circuiting.  The range of emotions I have experienced this week have been vast.  All in the name of doing the right thing.  Sometimes, I wish I could be bad, I could be mean and cold.  For quite sometime I always gravitated toward people with this fickle nature, I myself could never muster up the courage to cut my eyes at someone and storm off (well maybe I've done that a couple of times and it usually involved some sort of naughty boy).  I can be a big ol sensitive sap most of the time, but I am learning the ways of the world and standing my ground.  Feels good, feels new.

I auditioned for Volkswagon today and they called me back for Mercedes.  Fancy huh?  Some big German director that won a prize at the Cannes Film Festival.  I had to play a Sex and the City type gal, so I busted out my vintage Chanel, straightened my do and pretended I was back on 5th Avenue.  It was fabulous and I knew I did a good job.  There were 10 other women around me, they all were in the same age range, some took better care of themselves than others.  A few opted for the botox and collagen lips, it was obvious and I felt bad for them. They didn't look younger, they looked preoccupied. The woman sitting next to me was feverishly texting away on her blackberry, I was close enough to read over her shoulder.  I was so bored, I took a peek, I couldn't resist.  She was chatting away with three different guys.  She wanted to skype with one, (I have skyped once in my life, when all that mess first came out and it was with a movie star, to this day I associate skyping with wealth and privilege, I really need to get with the times because from what I understand everyone does it).  She also wanted to nap with number two and take a yoga class with number three.  I was enthralled.  How could she keep up?  I can barely text with one person, let alone hustle a few.  The immediate sense of intimacy weirds me out.  It seems like people can ask for something more easily when there is an electronic gadget and space between them.  I don't know if I will ever get used to it.  There is just something so smarmy about it.  I prefer to hear someone's voice.  I am fighting a losing battle so I take to my blog and rant about it...blah, blah, blah.

Recently I've learned to balance budgets, manage timelines and deal with a plethora of personalities.  It's all a cake walk except the latter, but there is a beauty in that as well.  We are all so different, it's fascinating to me. I get to put myself in the others shoes and how they think.  I learn about my ways and how I'd like to do things differently.  Not better, just different, saunter down a different path, kicking up the dirt as I go.